Not a Good night

There are good days and there are bad days in life. You never know what is going to come your way. I had a good day, I hung out at my friend Jens all day with the girls. It was relaxing! However I had a not so good night. I was (am) having difficultly sleeping. When this happens my mind starts to wander and goes places it shouldn't. Tonight it went to Sarah Grace. I don't really know how I can explain how I feel, because even when I type it I know that it's wrong and I shouldn't feel that way. And it doesn't make sense and its the way I feel, if it doesn't make sense to me how can it make sense to anyone else? So how do I get myself to sleep. I go pick my little one up out of her crib and I rock her and cry. And regret the fact that its after midnight and I'm still up and the girls will be up in a few short hours. And yet here I am typing! Yup I've lost my mind:)